Madness takes it's toll

So Ari and I are walking back from the school having dropped Ada at gymnastics and Grace is sleeping in the ergo, the following conversation happens:

Ari: can we decorate for Christmas.
Me: yeah but probably not totally over the top.
Ari: aw but why?
Me: Well do you know what cynical means?
Ari: no.
Me: it's like a grownup version of grumpy.
Ari: ok and...
Me: And Lee and I are still kinda cynical.
Ari: but why? Why are you grumpy?
Me: Well sometimes bad things happen to grownups and it takes us awhile to get over it.
Ari: like what?
Me: well like your father.
Ari: God, Scott? You're still not over that? Like really mom? That was like 24 years ago!!
Me: *bursts out laughing* wow, ok, touche kid. I guess you're right.
Ari: like really mom get over it, it's Christmas!
Me: well Lee's somewhat Christmas cynical too.
Ari: Why?
Me: well he was married once too and it didn't work out for him either and sometimes when you're separated from your kids or you're alone at Christmas it makes you sad and kind of cynical for awhile, I think we need to ease into this holiday cheer thing kinda slowly.
Ari: *rolls eyes* really, just get over it. Like come on!
Me: Ok well point taken.
Ari: I mean why would you be sad without Scott?
Me: well I'm not, at all actually it's more to do with how poor we were when you were little and how worried I was that I couldn't buy you things and take care of you the way I wanted to.
Ari: But mom, I don't need THINGS, I need you!!!
Me: you've got a really good attitude kid, I love you.
Ari: I love you too mom, now can we decorate for Christmas.
Me: I'll think about it.
Ari: good cause last Christmas was kind of crappy.
Me: I promise this year will be better than last year.

And hug and end scene.

I swear I couldn't make this shit up, I'm not much for touchy mushy stuff but this totally melted me. I really love that kid, so fricken much.